lashtoomonyon

A memory I'd like to share,
When i was about 10 my Dad and his mate Caddy were rehearsing in our front room, My Dad played piano and his mate Caddy played guitar, they were practicing a few tunes they played in local pubs in the 1960's,
Caddy's guitar was slightly out of tune so he was twisting the tuners and a string snapped,
" oh I've lashedtoomonyon " he said, That ended the practice session and Caddy went home,
My Dad asked me, did you know what he meant and I answered, no, So my Dad explained,

they both worked in windy Arbour Pit at that time, Windy arbour pit was a low depth mine and the coal was dragged up in carts on a track by a winch, if you lashed too many carts of coal the cable of the winch would snap and all the carts would roll back down to the pit and it would prove catastrophic for the miners and profit of the pit so. It was important never to lashtoomonyon,

But, Tom, the carts wouldn't roll back down, for two reasons.
One, because they would have a drag hooked on the back of them and, two, they'd be stopped by a warwick.

Tha'sees!

thi probably reet Tonks but, In my folklore tale of lashtoomomy on, drag hooks and warwicks were not mentioned to the mesmerized 10 year child enjoying the free concert in the front parlour,

Our "SuperMule" was based on the 'drag' principal. I should never've let that go. Could've been a £multi-millionaire£ by now. Well, probably not, but not short of a few shillin'!

go on then i'm all ears, what was your super mule ?

A mule that was rather...well....super

It seemed like a good idea, but wasn't marketable in it's, then, form.
A company in Luton, who'd bought a few dozen off us, discovered that it could be easily over-ridden (if you knew how!)
I went down to Luton while they showed me. And it was true.  But, all it needed was 'fine-tuning'. I redesigned it and started to put it into production, having been saddled with over 140 of the old design.  Then I lost interest and bought a farm in Spain instead!

I think I still have the patent for it, but it needs renewing, at over £6,000!

well done you tonker, I invented a tomoguard for central heating to stop sludge build up, It was an easy DIY that anyone could attach to a radiator instead of paying £200 for a magnetic filter that are mandatory on new boiler fixes, I submitted my design to the legal requirements brigade only to find out, I had to pay a fee of £800 just for them to search if anyone else had thought of it, then another fee of an undisclosed amount for production under the ' patent pending' scheme, My idea was so simple that, it can be fitted in seconds to any system so i thought, I'd rather give it than pay all the leeches sucking my blood, So ,
Its still on the drawing board and probably always will be,

I didn't invent it, Tom. It was one of Roy Thomas's ideas, when he was importing Hobby caravans and the gyppoes were towing them away. I got roped in for having them made, in Haydock, by Mr Cowapp's engineering firm, then powder coated in Earlestown.
My father-in-law bought it off Roy, then, when it went pear-shaped, I got saddled with it.
Roy copied the idea off a WW1 field gun. The device stopped the gun from re-coiling when fired.

Roy then invented a barrel lock which, after he'd spent well over £100k on it, was proved pointless by Bob Norburn (of Dragon's Den fame). Someone around the Appley Bridge area has that patent now.

They were a daft lot. Well over a £million went west on daft ideas and inventions.
Father-in-law and Roy are both dead now. Bob invented some special shaving cream and is still marketing that now.

Look at his snatch!

"Hubbard's participation made history at the Olympic Games, but the transgender athlete was unable to register a lift in the snatch"

Not to mention her 'clean and jerk'!